Friday, April 15, 2011

Helping Women Succeed...through serendipity

If you were to ask yourself what are the top four things it takes for you to succeed and achieve in EVERY area of your life, how would you respond?

You & I are called to a live in a manner which appropriately responds when life throws us totally outrageous, exciting and unplanned life-changing adventures.

The only way to a safe arrival and the ability to sustain equilibrium is to set one's will to become a permanent resident who solely responds from a place of consistent, yet active rest. The kind of rest that enables you to operate from the center of your intuitive power, no matter what activity you engage in.

I believe humans generally want the same things. Those four things in my opinion are:
1) Health
2) Stability
3) Peace of Mind
4) Confidence

A life filled with health, stability, peace of mind & confidence is the wellspring of all your joy, peace, & power. This infrastructure is paramount to achieve the impossible life we're constantly summoned to NAVIGATE. No matter how much or how little you or I know, we must become committed to continuous learning.

Every challenge is a personal invitation to discover more about who you are, what the world is all about and better coordinate thoughts, actions and consistent, yet active rest.

I recently had the opportunity of being interviewed by Ashley Arn Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (MFC #49853), Founder of Orange County Counseling. If you live anywhere near her, you should look her up and acquire her services!

In this interview, I was presented with a series of insightful questions which enabled me to be transparent for the sake of countless others as well as celebrate and honor my evolution as an individual, daughter, wife, sister, extended family member and friend!

When life is all said and done, life ONLY belongs to those who take strategic action. Even if you aren't a woman, there's still many perils you can obtain from my interview and myriad posts/resources available available from the homepage of Dr. Arn's website.

The link to the interview is:

To your greatness,

Pen name Tatum

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

A Long way to go & a short time to get there!

As I find myself looking at my own life and my clients, I find myself being asked more often what one can do to align their life and remain organized. To help you regain control of your life, what follows are three tips which will help you manage your personal and professional life.

To your greatness & imminent success!

Tip #1
Consult daily with your “Priority Matrix” app or “TaskTask HD" app. These two apps provides a simple way to remain on task by looking at what needs to be done today, in what order, the future, a look at what’s scheduled, as well as an overview of projects and what’s going on other aspects of your personal life to see the big picture. This tool helps you easily keep many goals organized in one place and also affords the ability to share this information. Think of this tool as the GPS for navigating your chances toward obtaining success.

Tip #2
Invest in an app such as "iThoughtsHD." It’s a mind-map system that puts all the tasks in one place so you can always see where all of the tasks listed in Priority Matrix or TaskTask HD apps are headed.
It’s a minimal investment ($9.99), yet essential to remain internally and externally motivated.

Tip #3
Land all of your documents, recordings & follow up inquiries into "Evernote." provides an easy to track system that allows you to view your documents in one place as well as retrieve from any virtually any electronic device. They have a free as well as a premium version for pay. This will save you time and also help you keep necessary documents a couple clicks away.

All of these tips can be accomplished in 10 minutes or less. By following the advice provided, you will have a tangible process with built in support that enables you to purposefully become involved in every aspect of your life, whether you’re surrounded by supportive people or not. This approach allows you to set your own goals & effectively delegate when necessary, enabling a fool-proof method to a) take small actions to begin solving problems as they arise; b) properly evaluate negative perceptions of events and high expectations of others as they arise; & c) consciously choose to let go of unhealthy or unattainable goals and develop multiple sources of self-esteem while building the life of your dreams.

Sunday, February 20, 2011

A-HA moments

So I have one more week until I've completed my competition of life change. I declared to drink 12 Glasses of water per day, practice Spanish 3 days per week and consume flour 3 days per week.

During my morning exercise, I experienced an a-ha moment! I was focused on the days I'd allow myself to consume flour this week. What I quickly realized is a better goal would have been for me to limit my intake of desserts. It really isn't flour, its dessert!

The big picture is moderation. When moderation isn't working then its important to ask the difficult question: "What am I avoiding?" or "What is it that I stopped seeing?"

I realize that sweets are fun & comforting for ME. I live a life of such constraint & restraint. I'm so responsible and its one of the few places that I indulge.

What I know for sure is "Indulging is fine, it just has to be done in moderation."

So this week I'm going to be looking for ways to embrace moderation when I want to reach for a dessert or purchase something I can live without.

I also will extend myself grace and mercy when I want to live it long as its done under the umbrella of moderation.

To your greatness!

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Halfway Mark

So this weeks been many opportunities to be stressed, so many things to do & seemingly not sufficient time. However I do believe in rebounds. I've rebounded some of my time by getting up earlier, taking short breaks each day and multi-tasking in an innovative way.

I perceive most multi-tasking is done almost mindlessly. However I chose to multi-task by grouping similar duties and complementing duties together.
For example, while exercising in the mornings, I read some necessary medical journal articles. During my evening exercise I read portions of three different books I'm purposing to complete as soon as possible. While getting a pedicure, I used the time to check email, return messages & start masterminding exactly how I was going to prepare two presentations-one that was on Tuesday 2/15 & the other on Tuesday 2/22.

I got creative with one of my sessions by composing & reading a letter aloud in Spanish. The other two practice days I did while taking a long bath.

To set myself up for success with water I kept two filled bottles bottles-each 33.81 oz close to me. Each time I started thinking about how great something else other than the water would be, I'd just take a gulp of water before I gave myself the chance to nurse conflicting thoughts.

Two of the days I was out of town so I pre-packed water & drank the balance before leaving for my trip & upon return. I made an agreement with myself that I wouldn't have a glass of wine unless I had completed my water 1st.

The flour issue was a little more challenging...I LOVE desserts. I also recognize from my intense monitoring that I sincerely enjoy gravitating toward flour when I've got alot on my plate-its my miniature escape & I simply love trying desserts when they're presented in a pleasing manner.

I love to know things so I can discuss them with others. I also enjoy knowing when something isn't optimal caliber so I can alert others to NOT waste their calories.

So I succeeded, yet I owe a great deal of my success to these Trader Joe Acai Fruit Bursts. I've never really been a chocolate person, yet the hint of chocolate over fruit has literally hit the spot!

To your greatness...

Monday, February 7, 2011

Moving forward....

I've officially completed my 1st week goals. As is true in most things, it was easy at 1st and became challenging once I wanted something I had pre-chosen not to have.

I was at a cross-road. Would I choose to give in, re-interpret my goals or proceed forward toward my desire to purposely complete healthmonth....and get those Chuck Taylor's I promised myself at the end of February.

The way I got past my challenge & so can you...was to do the following:
1) Increase my circle of accountability & share my goals as well as popularize the site that I agreed to blog my journey for.

2) Plan...Plan & plan in advance what I'd eat, what days I'd eat flour, how I could carve out the time to learn Spanish as well as how I would make certain to drink enough water.

3) Question my thinking when i didn't get to have what I wanted.

These three approaches revealed that no matter how accomplished or far I perceive I've come in improving my life, there's always more re-tooling to be done.

I kept a VOSS 28.7 oz bottle of water alongside me. I usually began in the morning by downing 1 & setting another full bottle next to my keys or computer to remain congnizant of the need to drink more water-96 ounces to be exact!

I also looked at my calendar and noted the dates I was going to be in places where more than likely ther would be temptation to have flour. I pre-scheduled those dates as my days to indulge.

Last Friday I noticed a meltdown of sorts because I was tired of drinking water, wanted cookies & didn't quite feel like completing the tasks that were begging for my attention from nor my personal and professional pursuits.

This inability to have what I wanted got me present with the number of times I reach for flour products; how much I truly ENJOY flour...and how much flour provides mindless comfort to me if I'm not watchful.

The marching orders for me this week are Focus, Adaptability & Confidence.

Focus on the big picture-I desire to sustain & heighten my health, physical fitness & second language communication skills.

Adaptability in my ways of handling things & speaking to myself when things don't go my way.

Confidence in my ability to sustain and continually go the distance. Even things I don't understand, I'm certain that broken down into micro steps, I will focus, adapt & achieve the desires of my heart.

To your greatness!

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Resolutions REvisited Monthly

When you hear the word "resolutions" what comes to mind? If you're lucky to be naturally tenacious & focused its probably music to your ears!

If you're like the REST of the world, you'll probably resonate with the following finding "About half of all American adults (48%, according to a Marist poll taken in December) say they are at least somewhat likely to make a New Year's resolution this year. Their top vows: to lose weight (19%), quit smoking (12%) and exercise more (10%). Sound familiar?
The Marist poll also found that while 65% of people who made a resolution in 2008 kept their promise for at least part of the year, 35% never even made it out of the gate."

The $11 billion self-help industry attests to the fact that Americans, in particular, are obsessed with resolving to change and are willing to pay for it!
I perceive the missing for most of us, no matter the cost, is accountability. Even in the Times Magazine study
(Read more:,8599,1950511,00.html#ixzz1CpyHphbL) it appeared those who fared best were intentional, accountable & laser-like in what they purposed to accomplish.

In my personal life, professional pursuits & relationships that the best results have been cultivated and sustainable when I've been intentional, accountable & laser like in my purpose and strategy.

REvisit your resolutions DAILY or WEEKLY with Heath Month...

Health Month is an online game (located at which allows you & I to compete against ourselves & its 16,000...and counting other active users in striving to meet as well as supercede your goals.
I was immediately captivated by the idea and decided to engage in the challenge. I've resolved for the month on February to

Allow white flour 3 days a week
Drink at least 84 glasses of water a week
Study Spanish at least 3 days a week

The thing that I like so much about this site is its approachability. Even if you're afraid of change, it makes it pretty easy to wade in the shallows and pick a small goal. The other thing that I find attractive about this approach is the fact that you're only making yourself accountable for one month at a time.

This innovative approach allows you to REvisit your goals, get some accomplishment under your belt & manufacture motivation for the following month.

Before you know it, you'll have three months, then six & twelve. You'll finally get a taste of what it feels like to succeed in areas of your life where others have miserably failed!

Give it a go. You have so much to gain & lose all at the same time. When was the last time you had a game-plan that was a literal WIN-WIN!

To your best life....I've gotta get going and accomplish my goals.

Get yours too at

Sunday, May 9, 2010

What YOU and New Madrid, Missouri have in common?

When I mention the word earthquake, what’s the first thing you think about?
Most think about the State of California or if you recently watched 60 Minutes (April 2010), the San Francisco Oakland Bridge that’s far from being completed. This bridge is the main transportation vein for San Francisco and will generate widespread devastation if it fails to be completed before the next big earthquake.

Let's shift gears and discuss New Madrid. It’s a place many of you haven’t heard of until now. In the winter of 1811-12, the central Mississippi Valley, was struck by three of the most powerful earthquakes in U.S. history. On December 16, 1811, the violent shaking abruptly awakened residents’ of the town of New Madrid, Missouri.

Between Dec 16,1811 and February 7, 1812 the three violent earthquakes registered in at 8.6, 8.4 & 8.7 on the Richter scale. These earthquakes were stronger than the San Francisco earthquake of 1906 and the Alaskan Good Friday earthquake in 1964.

These quakes were felt from Canada to New Mexico, rang church bells in Boston, cracked log homes walls, which were 3-feet deep in St Louis and damned up the Mississippi River.

The interesting thing…

The earthquakes of that memorable winter were not freak events. On the contrary, scientists have discovered that strong earthquakes in the central Mississippi Valley have occurred on a predictable and frequent basis.

The Central United States is vulnerable to a damaging earthquake. With little or no warning, an earthquake in the New Madrid seismic zone will strike seven or more states, causing major physical, social, and economic disruption to a region that is home to forty million people.

The potential losses from future earthquakes of magnitude 6 or greater in the New Madrid seismic zone are expected to be significant, for at least three reasons: 1) the population centers, notably Memphis and St. Louis, have thousands of structures that are not designed and constructed to withstand the effects of earthquakes; 2) the region is characterized by poorly consolidated sedimentary rocks, which are poor foundation material; and 3) a New Madrid quake would impact a multi-state region (about 10 times larger than the area impacted by a California earthquake of comparable size).

What New Madrid has to do with you and I?

Your and my life, are a lot like the New Madrid seismic fault. Many pressures have been applied to the fault lines of our lives; several structures have been created in our lives, which cannot be sustained in the wake of the economic downturn. The very things we looked to as a life raft-the perfect home & marriage, the unshakable career, and a secure retirement have disappeared for millions of people. This has left many of us feeling lost, alone, disenchanted, depressed and resentful.

The only questions many are left to wrestle with, like the New Madrid impending earthquake are “when, how powerful and what can be done about it?”

The confusing part is many of us have more questions than answers. Many of us did all the “right things” & are left in the wake of a nightmare. We don’t have the resources at our disposal to create the solutions we are desperately longing for.

Reducing Vulnerability by retrofitting our infrastructure….

You and I will deal with earthquakes in life because it comes with the territory. However these earthquakes needn’t have the devastating results the impending New Madrid quake is forecast to have due to failing to create the necessary structural & transportation changes.

You and I are in the position to change our lives by creating a plan to address personal/professional/emotional/physical challenges and seizing opportunities, which present.

Lets embark on the journey by identifying your top 5 vulnerabilities:

**The things that came up for me were 1) perfectionism, 2) depending on my own resourcefulness, 3) pride, 4) insecurity & 5) the past.

Now that you’re aware of what you are up against, identify 5 ways, which you can respond to these vulnerabilities to recover and reclaim you life.


Using the above example, my plan of escape follows. May it serve as an example to get you engaged in the process of permanent change.

To minimize the fault-line of Perfectionism, I will respond to this vulnerability by learning to ask for help. I will more quickly share what’s plaguing me with close confidants who can help shoulder the burdens I’m experiencing.

To minimize the fault-line of depending on my own resourcefulness, I will follow the same advice I’ve given myself regarding perfectionism, do a lot more listening during times of reflection, less speaking & listening for agreement i.e. during prayer, messages I listen to, advice provided from colleagues, friends and associates. I will remember that ‘none of us are as smart as all of us & none of us are islands.’

To minimize the fault-line of pride, insecurity & past regrets, I will work on becoming mindful of the ways I default to being a perfectionist and depending on my own resourcefulness. In doing so, much of the pride, insecurity and the past regrets will significantly minimize or vanish in its ability to control my thought life and behaviors.

Remember, learning without application is entertainment. Take the time to ask yourself the difficult questions and create your plan of action.

I guarantee the next time an aftershock or full on earthquake hits, you’ll be glad that you did.

To your greatness